Thursday, November 14, 2013

Day 684...Year 2

I am thankful for my Health Insurance and the life care benefits we are offered at work... Not only is our insurance a good value the Life care benefits that are open to all employees are there to help with all over health... Without them I probably wouldn't feel the way I do today... Mentally healthier and happier...

Now I am not going to say I am 100%, but I am much closer than I have ever been because I have faced the trauma's of my childhood and realized that I am not a victim but a survivor...

With that being said, that doesn't mean I have completed all of my battles, but the biggest one has been faced and called for what it was... NOT MY FAULT!!!

As I continue my journey I am realizing little things a long the way... This past weekend I realized that I am more like my Mom than I have ever admitted and I don't mind... She may not see it but we both have infectious smiles and giggles... When we are hurt emotionally, we hurt deep... We are passionate about the people we care about and the causes that matter the most to us... Everyone sees her as quiet and reclusive but in many ways I see myself this way... Now people that know me are probably saying NO WAY! But I realized something this past weekend... It doesn't take much for me to feel like I am out of place, that I start to doubt I should be somewhere, even if I were invited... But I cover it up by being over the top... I laugh and joke and in some instances dance like a crazy person or make jokes to cover my lack of comfort with the situation...

When you are with a group of friends that are all talking about certain topics and you give an over the top response doesn't mean you are an expert or have even been in that situation, it just means you are believable...

Musicsongbird