Sunday, August 18, 2013

Day 596...Year 2

This morning I awoke with the voice of Barney in my head... No, not the purple singing dinosaur, but the womanizing best friend of Ted, Marshall, Lily and Robin on How I Met Your Mother... I heard, "Suit up!" Ahhhh, my Monday...

As I went through the process of suiting up I hopped on the scale and I heard a scream coming from beneath my feet... I looked down and realized I had not caught a cat's tail but rather the scale was crying in agony... I literally saw tears coming from the screen showing me a horrible number and the scale pleaded me to step off...

After quickly stepping off I began to go through the ritual of getting ready... When I sat down on the bed to put on my socks I had flash backs of thinner times when putting on socks and shoes didn't require being in a sitting position and I didn't have to use my pant leg to get my shoe closer so I could tie it...

I think I am as close to rock bottom as I want to get...

And then I go even farther over the edge... I always keep snacks like granola bars or pirates booty in my desk... Well, I guess I needed to taste all of it today... Because I didn't eat it because I was hungry... Of course once I got past that initial tasting, I didn't really taste it... I was just on auto pilot, eating for the sake of putting something in my stomach... Not because I was feeding a physical hunger but apparently an emotional one...

Well, it continued to tonight... After dinner Mom and I watched Larry;s Country Diner and then Mom asked if I wanted to have some 3-2-1 cake and I asked if she wanted tacquitos... Well, we ended up having both and then we ran outside to empty the rain buckets into the front bed, getting extremely wet in the process... When we came back in, I decided a few more tacquitos were needed...

Now as I sit back and think about my day, I realize I am in deep and I need to start swimming toward the surface and get myself away from the bottom of the ocean... I am drowning and I know how to swim...

Time to grab onto a life preserver and get back to the surface...

Musicsongbird