Hi! I have been dealing with the ups and downs of life and my waist line and this blog follows my journey.
Day 247 of 365
Someday's I just don't know what to say. Tonight that is how I am feeling. Most days I actually think about what I am going to write about and today I have nothing. I feel empty. I had a great day working but I just feel empty. No words, just silence. Maybe that's just how we need to be sometime. When the world around us gets to loud, that is the time when we need to find the peace of quiet.
This past week and been one of rejuvenation and realization...
I'm feeling stronger each day and physically better as well, despite the itchy belly from the incisions healing... I've went from all protein drinks to pureed food... It's amazing how good it feels to eat BBQ Chicken again... Even after it's been run through the magic bullet... Since I have to avoid sugar I have found a delicious Sugar Free BBQ sauce and a decent SF Ranch Dressing... In a matter of days I will be able to move on to solid foods which is very exciting!!!
I am definitely seeing differences in my size and am fitting into a few thins that were tight before or stopped fitting well all together... I can't wait to start donating things I no longer fit because they are too big!!!
I've been having these moments where I don't feel any different despite the fact that my stomach is now considered a pouch and can only hold 5 oz instead of 128 oz... Mind blown... I told my mom that I wish I co…
8... the age I started gaining weight
44... my current age
185... my weight my 8th grade year
383 ... my last weigh in at the Doctor's office
0... What I have to lose
Everything... What I have to gain
I have finally reached my breaking point...
I contacted my Doctor in the beginning of January asking about my options and now I am waiting to speak to the Bariatric Surgery Center... This isn't a decision I made over night... I thought about it, prayed about it, researched it online and spoke to friend who's husband has been through it recently...
I am not taking any of this lightly... I am educating myself before I go through with it... I am going to an information session this week and calling the Doctor's office since my referral was approved... So now all I can do is wait a few more hours and I will see which direction my life will be heading...
January 30, 2018
I haven't had anxiety like this since my Freshman year of college... I have had a coupl…
It has been a wild and crazy ride this past 3 months since I laid on the operating table. I have had highs and a some lows but I am seeing a new side of myself I haven't seen in a long time. Many have pointed out the happiness they see in me again and I feel it. I'm really starting to like who I see in the mirror again, feeling like all of my hard work is paying off.
People ask how my depression is and I can say not as many down moments as before but they aren't gone. There are many evenings like tonight where I just feel sadness. Not 100% sure why I am feeling it but I am. The tears on the verge of spilling and so many things swirling through my mind. But I will lay down and pray and hopefully when I awake the feelings will have passed.