Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Day 38 of 365

Looking for a reason, roaming through the night to find my place in this world... - Michael W. Smith

I think we all strive a greater meaning for our life. I am daughter, sister, Niece, Aunt, Friend, co-worker...but I want more. I want to be mother and wife and grandma, God willing. But for now all I feel is lonely. I have a wonderful mom, amazing brothers and sisters-in-law, loving family and friends but I still feel like I am missing out. 

Last night I ran into a co-worker I haven't seen in almost a year and we were talking about another former co-worker and he was talking about her and how he couldn't believe this 24 year old girl had never kissed a guy and how crazy that was and he kept going on about it. The whole time inside me I was screaming for him to shut up and that there is nothing wrong with her, but as I keep thinking about it maybe there isn't wrong with her but I feel like there is something wrong with me and maybe I am just not destined to be with anyone. To be everyone's best friend and favorite Aunt and co-worker etc, but never anything more than that. 

....
musicsongbird